Ok, so you know from previous posts that I was married for thirteen years, and I have been single for sixteen years now. Yes, I almost got married in 2005 but I didn’t. I believe some people are meant to be single, and I am one of them.
If I were married would I be able to go on this incredible journey? Not a chance. I don’t know of a single man that would allow their spouse to take off for 5 plus years. I am, and I can’t wait! Being single means I can do what I want, when I want. I don’t have to ask or let someone know what I am doing.
Do you remember the movie “Family Man”? Do you remember the scene when he, Nicholas Cage talked about doing the same thing every day? I believe it was the part when he wanted the expensive suit. It is getting into the boring rut that keeps going through my mind. When you get married it is all exciting and new and then you start getting use to a routine and things get taken for granted and the boredom sets in. I don’t want to be bored!
I have friends that can’t be alone. They HAVE to have a man/woman in their life at all times. This is something that I do not understand, and I believe if they spent some time alone they would be able to figure out who they truly are and not try to be someone that they are not. I know of women who have changed who they are for the person they are currently with.
The plus side to being married is the knowing that someone will always be there for you. That is a comforting thought but, will they? I know of a few couples that have been married for 20 plus years and one day, it is over. The person that you committed your life to has changed, and in a drastic way. And it is usually because of someone else. You spend years building a life with someone and one day it is all gone. That is not a risk I honestly want to take again.
I hope I don’t sound like I am against marriage because I am not. I loved being married, and I was a devoted wife. There are a few couples that I know that have strong marriages and I enjoy spending time with them. One is my Aunt Marlene and Uncle Tom. They have been married for 54 years now and still going strong. Another couple is Darlene and Bruce. Darlene works with me and has been married for 33 years. Now, I’m not saying that they have perfect marriages, but damn good ones. I love to hear Darlene talk about Bruce during the day. He was her first love, and she wants nothing more. That is a rare find these days, and I am happy for them.
I don’t mind being the 3rd, 5th or 7th wheel. My friends know that that is just me! Even when I was in a relationship and the person I was with didn’t want to do whatever was planned, I still went. I would not stay home because he didn’t want to do something. And I didn’t try to make him or talk him into going with me. If you don’t want to do something, then don’t do it. I would rather you not be there than for you to go and complain the whole night or just make me miserable because you don’t want to be there. Simple as that.
The advantages to being single are:
1. I can do what I want, when I want.
2. I don’t have to shave if I don’t want to.
3. I don’t have to cook if I don’t want to.
4. There will always be a frosty beverage in the fridge when I get home.
5. I can sleep on whatever side of the bed I want to!
6. I don’t have to watch Sports Center
7. I can cook the way I like to.
8. And last but not least, I CAN DO WHATEVER I WANT!
When this journey is over I might consider settling down, but right now, I will just enjoy the ride…
This is my journey…